hahaha..

not bad =]

TEACHER:    Maria, go to the map and find North America . 
MARIA:       Here it is. 
TEACHER:    Correct.  Now class, who discovered America ? 
CLASS:        Maria.
 

TEACHER:   John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? 
JOHN:  You told me to do it without using tables. 


TEACHER:  Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?' 
GLENN:     K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' 
TEACHER:  No, that's wrong 
GLENN:       Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.   


TEACHER:   Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? 
DONALD:    H I J K L M N O. 
TEACHER:   What are you talking about? 
DONALD:    Yesterday you said it's H to O.   


TEACHER:   Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. 
WINNIE:     Me! 
   

TEACHER:   Glen, why do you always get so dirty? 
GLEN:   Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.   

TEACHER:     Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. ' 
MILLIE:       I  is... 
TEACHER:     No, Millie..... Always say, 'I  am.' 
MILLIE:       All right...  'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'       


TEACHER:    George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.   Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? 
LOUIS:      Because George still had the axe in his hand...     


TEACHER:    Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? 
SIMON:     No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.   

TEACHER:     Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his? 
CLYDE :      No, sir. It's the same dog.  


TEACHER:     Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? 
HAROLD:       A teacher 




hahahaha...